"I'm KIDDING!" Sarcasm: The American Virtue

 
Two weeks ago, Fr. Theodore briefly mentioned sarcasm in his Sunday sermon.  It wasn’t the main topic, he just touched on it for a moment.  However, his words regarding the subject made an impact.  He mentioned how when we use sarcasm, we are trying to bring others down to our level.  We Americans use sarcasm in a most peculiar fashion—using humor as a means to say some very hurtful things, only to conclude with a not-so-reassuring “I’m KIDDING!”  I just overheard a conversation in my office 
 
Person 1: exclaims loudly in a rather serious tone to Person 2  “Now get away from my desk and let me work!” 
Person 2: either can’t sense her sarcasm and takes offense or just isn’t in the mood for sarcasm, so he walks away. 
Person 1 (in a can’t-you-take-a-joke guffaw/giggle):  “I was kidding!”
Person 2 doesn’t bother to respond, and of course, awkward silence ensues in Cubical Land. 
 
I’m realizing that it’s okay not to take a joke.  Because most of the time, these jokes are just sarcastic jabs that try to bring you down.  Also, these “harmless” jokes often carry a grain of truth that is painful and embarrassing to hear.  I’m sure we’ve all been on the receiving end of these jabs at least once, and as you know, it’s not always easy to “get over.”  I’m not saying we should react in a childish, oversensitive manner.  I guess that some remarks are just worth shrugging off—no need to put in the effort to give a polite chuckle. 
 
I think it would be safe to say that we, as Americans, have a tendency to uphold humor as some sort of virtue.  Ask anyone to describe themselves, and they’d probably say, “I’ve got a good sense of humor...”  Well, okay, so does everyone else… no matter how un-funny they really are.  But hey, if you can’t take a joke then, man, you have a serious problem! 
 
Now, by writing this, don’t think that I’m some dour, solemn, cranky person.  I like having a good laugh now and then, and I readily admit that I think of myself as having a “good sense of humor,” just like everyone else.  I’m not Will Ferrell/stand-up comedian funny…I just think you need a shred of humor now and then to get through this crazy world.  However, I also wonder when and how being “funny” became more important than being a genuine person.  As Fr. Theodore mentioned, we use sarcasm as a means to bring others- authority in particular—down to our level.  It’s a way of dismissing any shred of respect, and excusing it all in the name of “good fun.” 
 
I think that the purpose of humor is to pepper our lives—to bring forth a joyous delight that builds others up.  But too often I’m starting to realize that humor, even among adults, is overused, overplayed and often utilized with bad taste and timing. 
 
Just another lesson I’ve gleaned here in “Cubical Land.”